Do You Feel At Peace With Screens?

Hello!
I’ve been playing with finding clarity and peace of mind around screens for myself and my children for years.

A few years ago, I went through a phase of having Facebook as a control pattern, and checking it many times a day.

A couple of years ago I played with unrestricted device time for myself and my children, to see if they (and I) would self-regulate.

I’ve gone through phases of screen abstinence, for both myself and my children.

Since I’ve been making my online courses, I’ve been really happy and aligned about my own screen use.

And that is because I’ve been using screens in service of meaningful work.

I’ve been using screens to meet my needs for purpose, contribution, and creativity.

And I’ve been using them with lots of consciousness and choice.

For example, nowadays I rarely check Facebook on my phone – maybe once every few weeks. I generally use it to contribute in my course groups and other groups.

I’m using screens in service of my passions, rather than letting myself be pulled and swayed without making conscious choices.

I usually have a couple of hours a day, before my children wake up, working on my courses, newsletters and websites.

And then in the afternoon or early evening, we will all have family screen time, on average one-and-a-half to two hours.

But for quite a long time, I have felt really uncomfortable about my children’s screen time.

I’ve been uncomfortable, comparing myself, fearing judgment by others, feeling tight and tense around it.

And then I created my Kids, Screens and Aware Parenting Course.

And unusually, I created the whole course before it’s started.

And even if no-one does the course (although I hope they will!)

I am really glad that I made it.

Because I don’t feel uncomfortable, tight, or tense around their screen time any more.

I feel at peace, aligned, comfortable and free around it.

I’ve got there through doing my own self-reflections; doing all the exercises in the course.

I’ve really explored needs, beliefs, thoughts, sweet spots, and strategies for connection.

I’ve got clear on my values.

I’ve been really observing my children, and listening to them.

I’ve been remembering what is important to me.

And I can see that my peace around screens is affecting my children.

What a relief it is for them to have a mother who is no longer in conflict around their screen time.

I see that they feel more at peace about it too!There’s harmony where there was tension.There’s ease and connection where there was challenge.

And it reminds me of an article I wrote quite a long time ago.

It was about how screens can be used in service of our values and our evolution,

or to repress our feelings and stop us from growing.

For example, seeing the whole of the earth from space on television in 1966 shifted our global consciousness.

What do I mean by this?
We can get on Facebook to repress our feelings of sadness and disconnect from those around us,

Or we can get on Facebook to connect to a global community, feel a sense of belonging, and contribute meaningfully to others.

We can mindlessly scroll, as a way of dissociating from a sense of meaninglessness in our lives.

Or we can create something, an article, a piece of art, something that will make a difference to others and bring a sense of meaning and purpose to our lives.

And having consciousness about HOW our child/ren are using screens, understanding what needs, values, and passions they are following, makes all the difference in how their relationship with screens, and us, develop.

Understanding them and what is going on for them, and staying connected with them, before, during and after screen use, makes all the difference.

I believe that we need to use all our skills of awareness, consciousness and compassion to use screens skillfully, for ourselves, and to model that to our children and teenagers.

What can you do to bring more consciousness to your screen use?

When do you use screens to repress, and when to transcend?

When do use screens in service of your values, and when do you use them in ways that have no meaning for you?

When  do you use screens as part of your growth and evolution, and when do you use them to avoid growth and evolution?

I invite you to listen to what needs get met for you and your child/ren on screens.

I invite you to listen to what thoughts and beliefs you have around screens, and translate them into needs, and reframe them where necessary.

I invite you to discover your sweet spots, and bring healing to those places.

I invite you to find ways of staying connected with yourself and your child/ren, before, during and after, screen use.

I invite you to understand what is going on, make conscious choices, and feel at peace about your choices.

And if you’d like help, ideas and support with doing those kinds of things,

I’d love to see you in my Kids, Screens and Aware Parenting Course,

Click here to find out more.

I’d love to hear if this resonates with you! Please write and let me know!

Much love,

Marion xxx