Where are you in your life with sharing your gifts and doing what you love?
So many of us acquired painful beliefs about showing up in the world.
It might have been when we were a toddler, wanting to show how dance around the kitchen, and one of our parents was distracted or depleted or exhausted, and they shamed us or ignored us.
It might have been how we were born – if we were pulled out too soon, or our mother was under anaesthetic, or we were separated from her.
It might have been when we went to school, and enthusiastically put our hand up to answer a question, and the teacher laughed at us or didn’t see us, or told us we were wrong.
All of these experiences form our beliefs about sharing our gifts in the world.
How do we know what our gifts are? Well they are usually what bring us alive; what make our heart sing, what we find time to do even when the day is full.
And each of our gifts are so different. One of mine is writing. When I write every morning, first thing, my whole being lights up. I feel deeply connected with myself, with my source of creativity, and with that fulfillment, I effortlessly connect with my kids.
For you it might be making delicious food for your family, or creating art, or sewing, or helping children, or families, or animals, or nature. It might be designing a garden or creating a sculpture. It might be cutting people’s hair, or giving them a massage, or helping them connect with their purpose in life. It might be helping people sort out their finances, create the love life they long for, making their own business or booking the holiday of their dreams. There are a million different versions of what bring us alive.
However, when we take each step to doing more of what we love, or sharing it with more people, we often come across those beliefs that we acquired when we were very young.
So, if our dad could not celebrate our dancing around the kitchen because he was so stressed about work, we might believe that “If I share my gifts, I’ll be punished,” or if our mother repeatedly told us to be quiet when we were singing so that we wouldn’t wake our sibling, and sent us to our room, we might believe something like, “If I do what I love, I’ll be all alone.”
And these beliefs can feel so real, and can show up in such apparently real ways.
At the beginning of 2015, I created my Aware Parenting Instructor Mentoring Course. As I received many replies from interested people about what they wanted, the course developed and became so much more.
I realised that this combined so many of the things that I’m passionate about.
Not only Aware Parenting, which of course is the whole foundation of it all, but other things. Things like I am talking about now – moving through and past beliefs we have acquired about sharing our gifts with the world, about speaking up, about being our own unique flavour, about being who we really are.
Not only this, but showing you how to create a pre-consultation questionnaire, and how to read it to see what is going on for a family, and what is really needed.
How to create your own workshops.
How to write emails, create a list, and create a blog.
How to find your own unique way of combining being a parent and an Instructor.
How to co-create a tribe of people who love what you do.
I realised that this course combines many of my passions – it’s not just about getting more confident with Aware Parenting theory and practice, it’s about shining your light in the world, stepping up, coming home to yourself, sharing your unique flavour, and the tools and strategies that help that happen.
And as that all became clear, and more requests came from people about what they wanted to be included, I became clear that it was a bigger course than I had first thought, and that I would need to charge more for it to reflect the extra time it would take me to create and run it.
And this is where I came up against my next layer of old beliefs.
Beliefs such as, “people won’t like me” and “people will think I’m asking for too much.”
For several days, I sat with an intense discomfort with the thought that I would need to charge more than I originally thought.
I am so grateful to two dear friends, who listened to me, encouraged me, and kept me sitting close to my sweet spot about valuing what I do. One kept telling me how valuable what I do is, and I kept on laughing and laughing (releasing fear!!) And another kept encouraging me to listen to what felt really true for me about pricing.
I wanted to both value what I do, and make it accessible for everyone who really wanted to do it, whatever their financial situation.
So, I came to the idea of charging what felt true for me, and offering some scholarships for people.
I thought that was all sorted out, and I sent out the course details and sign up page.
No sooner than the dust had settled on sending that out, and I heard from a friend on FB that a photo of my children sleeping was in a local newspaper article in a story about new research on children’s daytime naps.
I wrote a short post about it on FB, and was amazed to received 40 comments from friends sending their love and telling me that they were shocked.
That same day, I received 3 emails from someone who was obviously trying to sell me his services as a website developer of some kind. But he did it in a shocking way, saying that I was an imposter and a scam artist and giving me suggestions for how to change my marionrose website. I was shocked and upset.
So, I again wrote on my FB wall – I had also found out that the sleeping image had been used by about 140 people including several blogs promoting controlled crying. On Facebook, I asked for some loving intentions to come my way!
Spontaneously, one friend, who is a lawyer, phoned up to help me.
Another couple of friends phoned up to give me support.
Then I had a look at Facebook and was amazed and moved to receive 40 responses from friends, and so many incredibly touching words. Messages telling me that I had helped change their family’s lives, that they wanted me to keep speaking up, sending love, sending celebrations.
As I read through them, I started laughing. One comment really hit a sweet spot for me – to keep growing and becoming more wonderful (if that was possible); and then the next post sent me into tears. I had a big beautiful cry – all those old beliefs that if I shared my gifts, spoke up, valued what I do, that people wouldn’t like me and I’d be left all alone, they were being scattered to the winds.
In the laughter and the tears, and the outpouring of support, a new belief stepped in to take its place.
If I share my gifts, I’ll receive lots of support.
Ahhh, if I share my gifts, I’ll receive lots of support.
And how much more wonderful that feels!
And what I love is, so much of the Aware Parenting Instructor Mentoring Course is based on this – looking at the different ages and stages in your lives, and shining your lights and sharing your own unique gifts.
On each step of sharing our unique gifts, we come up against the next level of belief. And moving past those is incredibly joyful and wonderful!
And so, the sign-ups and scholarship requests for the course are coming in, and I feel so excited about each and every one of these people sharing their own unique flavour with the world.
I’d love to hear if this resonates with you.
What lights you up? What do you love to do?
What edge are you on at the moment?
What new beliefs have come to you?
With love,
Marion