Not only because having relationships with our Inner Loving Presences helps us feel a deep sense of loving presence and holding.
Not only because speaking from our I, our Love and Will, has a profound effect on our feelings (I’m writing another post about that now!)
But also because our lovingness and willingness directly affect how we respond to and respond from our bodies.
I’ll offer an example, about my relationship to how my body looks, and to exercise.
Living in a domination, colonised culture, I’ve imbibed a lot of cultural conditioning around ‘ageing’ (even the word itself tells us a lot!)
My experience tells me that as I get older, I become more and more powerful as a woman.
I believe that the domination colonised culture is based on a fear of the power of the feminine, of the body, of deeply embodied experience, of mature feminine wisdom.
I believe that much of colonised culture tries (often very successfully) to make women feel fear around becoming older, because of all the judgment and shaming that exists, to trick us into believing the lie that the mature feminine is weak.
My last birthday was my 52nd, and in my experience, as I live for more years, I become more and more centred in my lovingness and my power.
AND, I’ve done a lot of changing of my inner dialogue to become freer from cultural conditioning. AND I still experience elements of seeing ‘age’ through the culture I grew up in.
I wonder if you resonate?
As a younger woman, I used to be full of judgment around my body. My inner dialogue was extremely harsh.
I feel so sad when I remember back to my late teens, looking in the mirror every day at my body, and judging it.
What a paradox, given that at the time, my body was the stereotype of what is deemed acceptable in this culture.
Nowadays, my inner dialogue with my body is very loving, both automatically, and in the practices I engage in.
For example, this morning, when I woke up, I scanned through my body and sent unconditional love and gratitude to each area of my body, as I spoke, “I love you,” and “thank you,” with each breath that I received.
(By the way, I am interested when I think of the phrase, “take a breath” rather than “receive a breath.”)
So often in the shower, I will spontaneously say, “I love you” to my body.
What I love about The Marion Method work is that it isn’t affirmations.
If you say “I love you exactly as you are,” to your body, and another part of you doesn’t really believe it, this isn’t about trying to pretend, or coerce yourself to believe it.
The Inner Loving Presences work is all about listening lovingly to the parts of us that need to speak and be heard, before we’re willing to receive the unconditional love.
Another thing I love about The Marion Method is that it contains both Love and Will.
So, I can unconditionally love my body and how she looks, AND want things to be different.
For example, earlier on in the year I had the desire for my thighs to be more muscular.
My thighs had changed shape a lot over the previous few years, and the texture of the muscles and the skin had changed.
I have been unconditionally loving my thighs exactly as they are, AND I had the desire for them to look different.
After desire, comes willingness.
I did a Willingness Practice around my thighs.
And this coincided with other desires, things I wanted to change – I wanted to stay more connected with my body during the winter. I wanted to do Buteyko breathing practices every day with my Mum.
First comes wanting, then we can do The Willingness practice to connect with our willingness. I did that.
So, at the beginning of our 7 months of hibernation, I started with the Buteyko and the swimming.
All through willingness.
I didn’t coerce myself.
I didn’t make myself do it.
I was willing to do it.
And the wonderful thing about willingness, is that when it is flowing, it becomes bigger, like a river.
The willingness for those two things led to a willingness to do a daily face yoga practice.
Then I added on exercises, and jumping on the trampoline.
My 88 year old mum and I did these every day on her deck, so we were also spending more time together, and being outside every day during the winter.
We both transformed.
She had wanted a recumbent bike machine, and got one.
I brought my rowing machine downstairs, and we turned her room that was never used, to a gym, with her bike machine and my rowing machine next to each other.
She started off with 3 minutes and I started off with 30 rows.
Yesterday, she cycled for 18 minutes and I rowed for 500 times.
We both see how much fitter our bodies are. We’re both in awe.
And all this came from lovingness and willingness.
And I find myself here in spring, having been deeply connected with my body all winter.
And yes, my thighs are more muscular and more toned.
I loved them unconditionally then, and I love them unconditionally now.
I LOVE the combination of lovingness and willingness.
I love that true willingness comes from true lovingness.
I wonder if you resonate?
I wonder if you’ve noticed the difference between doing activities out of love for your body, or out of judgment of your body?
I wonder if you’ve noticed the difference between coercing yourself to do exercise, and doing exercise from deep willingness?
Big love! xoxo