I love the power we have as mothers to transform fear into not-willingness.
This isn’t for all types of fear.
This is for when we are feeling fear because we’re thinking of something that we don’t want to happen.
For example, I was feeling some fear yesterday before I went for my bike ride, remembering that some magpies were swooping along that path the day before.
So, first of all I acknowledged the fear (this isn’t spiritual bypassing):
“I hear that you feel scared,” (from my Inner Loving Mother).
Next, I turned around what I didn’t want into what I wasn’t willing to have happen:
“I am not going to hurt your babies, mother Magpie, and I am not willing for you to swoop me.”
What a different energy I went on the bike ride with.
I can imagine you can create those feelings right now.
If you want to, notice the feelings in your body when you say, “I’m scared when I think that the bird will swoop me.”
And how you feel in your body when you say, “I’m not willing for you/the bird to swoop me.”
It literally creates what I call a Neo No energy field around us.
Our unwillingness to have what we don’t want is a powerful force.
It has nonlocal effects on those around us.
As mothers, we have such power in this.
Claiming both our unwillingness for what we don’t want and our willingness for what we do want is us claiming our divine power as mothers.
At times, we might feel powerless, scared, or have given up on our needs. This is when we have lost connection with our will.
On the other end of the spectrum is blaming, anger that blames others, power-over, force, coercion and aggression. Those are forms of wilfulness.
Sacred power is in the middle of the spectrum and is where outrage and divine rage sit.
This might be our absolute, “NO! I am NOT willing for you to do this to my child / this child / this animal / this land.
As women, many of us were trained and conditioned to believe that we didn’t have power.
As children, our frustration and outrage may not have been heard and honoured.
Our culture teaches many of us to judge or blame ourselves or others rather than connect with what we’re willing and no willing for.
I’ve found that:
Being able to stay present in my body with feelings of frustration and outrage;
Getting clear about what I want and don’t want;
Being unwilling to force our coerce myself into doing things; and
Working with my willingness and not-willingness
Has given me a profound sense of authentic power in my body.
The power to say yes when I have a yes and no when I have a no.
The power to say a big YES when it’s a big yes.
And a big NEO NO – “I AM NOT WILLING FOR THAT” – when required.
As mothers, regaining our sacred power in these ways is so important, I believe.
So that:
Instead of passing down this power-over paradigm to our children, we pass down the new power-with paradigm;
We stand up together and say a big “I AM NOT WILLING” for the continuation of all the power-over that happens on this beautiful Earth;
We co-create new ways of being with power – power that contributes to others rather thank overpowers them.
We stand together as sister mothers, holding a, “WE ARE NOT WILLING FOR THIS TO CONTINUE” – imagine the powerful non-local effects of that!
What are you saying, “I am not willing for…” to?
THE POWER IN OUR UNWILLINGNESS
If something is happening in our life or in the wider world, we’ve been taught in our culture that there are two options:
To feel powerless – or to go into power-over / aggression.
But our sacred power is in between the two of these.
It’s our capacity to stand in our, “I AM NOT WILLING FOR THIS TO HAPPEN.”
(And of course we can have unconditional compassion for ourselves when we do feel powerless or shift into power-over).
I invite you to feel in to your body now when you try out these three statements around something that is happening that you don’t want to keep happening.
“I feel scared and powerless that [xyz] will happen.”
“[xyz] shouldn’t be happening. I am so angry at [person].”
“I am not willing for [xyz] to happen.”
How do you feel in each case?
Does it resonate for you that people around us pick up on which of these we are coming from?
That this is an energy that we put out into the world.
Life responds to our unwillingness.
This can operate in our relationships with our children, partners, parents, other people, and what’s happening to the planet.
This is a rooted, centred power.
This is a power-with Life.
This is connecting with the power of Life.
We may initially feel outrage; which is different from aggression. It is a clear, “NO!”
The outrage is a clear energy. It doesn’t blame. It’s what can power the, “I AM NOT WILLING.”
Imagine mothers, gathering together, all with our unwillingnesses.
An unwillingness for babies and children to be treated harshly.
An unwillingness for Mother Earth to be treated harshly.
An unwillingness for all beings to be treated harshly.
We have such power, not only in our individual, “I am not willing..” but most of all, in our collective
“WE ARE NOT WILLING for this to happen.”
Part of Transformation Through Mothering will be gathering together with our “WE ARE NOT WILLING…”
It’s coming soon!