I differentiate NEW shame and guilt from OLD shame and guilt.
I call my Inner Loving Crew work, “loving ourselves from within.”
In this Inner Loving Crew work, are literally changing our inner dialogue and our inner self-response.
As we shift our inner self talk, we can move away from creating new shame and guilt.
I remember once buying a smoothie and putting what I thought was the frequent customer card on the counter, only to see that it was a card from somewhere else. I knew that in the past, I would have hit myself with a shame stick at this point. But I didn’t do that.
I’ve changed my inner dialogue so that I don’t hit myself with shame and guilt sticks any more. So there’s no new shame and guilt.
With old guilt and shame, we can use the Inner Loving Presence Process.
Our Inner Loving Crew can lovingly hear how painful the guilt and shame was for our inner children; they can hear what we thought and felt and needed, and so on.
The experience can be deeply heard AND we can hear reparative phrases from our Inner Loving Crew, like, “you’ve never done anything wrong,” and, “there is nothing wrong with you and there never has been.”
Jana Kingsford and I did a FB live on Dreams.Love.Action today and one of the things I talked about was my passion in showing people that doing our inner work is nothing to be ashamed of; and is actually something beautiful.
When we follow our callings, including our parenting callings, our inner children inevitably show up to be heard. This isn’t something wrong. This isn’t something wrong with us. This culture is so full of shame and guilt and I am here to help shift that.
I see our inner work as when we are in the crysalis.
We need to be in the chrysalis to become the butterfly.
All stages of the journey are beautiful and important.
The caterpillar is the calling;
The crysalis is the old feelings and inner children and old beliefs that show up;
The butterfly is us becoming more who we really are in the world.
Each stage is beautiful.
I’m passionate about helping mothers in particular to shift their inner dialogue so that they free themselves from creating new guilt and shame, and increase their compassion for the younger parts of them that feel old guilt and shame.
This is what my Inner Loving Presence Process Course is all about.