♡ Are you and your child/ren feeling the effects of Love-Hurts (disconnection, loss, grief) and Will-Hurts (powerlessness, frustration, outrage)? ➳
♥ In these powerful times, I am seeing, more than ever, the call for Psychospiritual Parenting and ReParenting.
✧ In this article, I’m going to talk about:
✧ The powerful impact of the domination culture;
✧ How that can affect our true nature as Love and Will;
✧ How we can help our child/ren stay more connected with their Souls (Love and Will);
✧ How parenting also invites us to reconnect more deeply without our Lovingness and Power;
✧ I’ll offer practical suggestions for how you can reconnect in with your innate Love and Will right now;
✧ And how you can help your child/ren;
✧ And I’ll share the psychospiritual invitation of these times that I see.
☯ At the cornerstone of this work lies our true nature as Souls – Souls as beings of Love and Will, who come into the world and are deeply affected by the culture, family and time we are born into.
☠ For most of you reading this, if you speak English, you will probably have been deeply affected by the domination culture, which started thousands of years ago with a belief in good vs. bad and a belief that spirit/consciousness/the mind were split from, and far superior to, matter/feelings and the body.
⤷ As Loving and Powerful Souls, our personalities have been shaped by this culture.
♡ Our innate Lovingness and sense of interconnectedness may have been affected by things like:
♡ Being separated from our mother as a baby;
♡ Not being held enough as a baby;
♡ Our physical closeness needs not being met;
♡ Being disconnected from the earth, the seasons, the local environment;
♡ A sense of disconnection from traditions and belonging;
♡ Judgment rather than compassion;
♡ Being shamed into believing there is something innately wrong with us;
♡ Being exposed to racism, sexism and all the other -isms which create internalised separation;
♡ Our preferences, interests and callings not being supported;
♡ Our grief, loss and sadness (around all our Love-Hurts) not being lovingly heard and instead being distracted, judged or shamed for feeling those feelings.
➳ Our innate power and sense of agency may have been affected by things like:
➳ Medical interventions that didn’t welcome our own birth timing;
➳ Our agency not being supported as a baby or a child, by the use of force, overpowering or coercion;
➳ Our No not being heard, valued and respected;
➳ Being punished, shamed or excluded for expressing a No;
➳ Being made to do things and being overpowered.
➳ Being guilted and internalising guilt so we guilt ourselves, which is inner coercion and punishment;
➳ Being punished.
➳ Our beautiful natural and normal frustration and outrage (in response to all of these things) not being welcomed and heard, and instead being shamed, silenced, distracted or punished for trying to express these.
༄ And yet, our Souls always call us forth to become more who we really are, for our personalities to reflect our Souls more clearly and be less constrained by cultural conditioning.
❀ Parenting does this in two ways:
❀ 1 – Our love for our children and our desire for them to stay more deeply connected with who they really are supports us in learning and growing and finding new ways of parenting.
❀ 2 – The second way is where we find parenting challenging – it is in the most painful and challenging places where the psychospiritual invitation is strongest – to heal from our own Love-Hurts and WIll-Hurts and cultural conditioning around our connectedness and our power, so that we are more and more able to respond to our children in the most loving and empowered and empowering ways.
❀ We can support our children to be much more connected with their innate Love and Power, and along the way, we can also be more and more reconnected with our own Love and Power.
∞ I believe that this is the psychospiritual call of these times.
∞ Our world is clearly showing the devastating effects of the domination culture and colonisation, and the twin Love and Will devaluing through a deep sense of separation and disconnection combined with power-over.
∞ Children, whether they are being directly affected by what is going on in the wider world, or whether they are simply being affected by it because they are in the field of it, will be showing us the effects of these deep Love-Hurts and Will-Hurts.
♡ Their experiences of separation and loss are profound Love-Hurts that we can support them with through providing them with as much closeness and connection as we can, combined with listening to their tears, grief and confusion.
➳ Their experiences of powerlessness and coercion are strong Will-Hurts which we can help them with through offering them agency and choice wherever we can, along with welcoming their frustration, tantrums and outrage.
☯ And of course, to do this, we need to do whatever we can to meet our own Love-Needs and Will-Needs, and hear our Love-Hurts and Will-Hurts.
❃ Are you willing to do that?
♡ If so, what are you willing to do that can meet your Love-Needs? That might be, right now, pausing as you read this and connecting in with the loving support of the chair, bed, floor or ground beneath you as part of your Loving Environment.
♡ That might be holding one hand on your head and the other on your belly, with the same quality of loving presence that you’ve given your child/ren when you’ve felt your love for them most strongly, and saying, “I’m here with you. I’m listening.” This is part of connecting with your Inner Loving Presences.
♡ That might be reaching out to a friend in whatever way you can in present circumstances – which might be a phone call, a text/Whatsapp/Voxer/Messenger message. That is connecting with your Outer Loving Crew.
♡ Connecting with our Loving Environment, Inner Loving Presences and Outer Loving Crew help us connect more with our Lovingness.
➤ What about Will?
➤ Are you willing to stand up, feel the support of the floor under your feet, and the connection with the sky above you, and feel yourself as the channel between the two, feeling that verticality of you?
➤ Are you willing to connect with something you are not willing for, and to speak that, from this standing place? “I am NOT willing for….” – How do you feel in your body when you do?
➤ Are you willing to take action, to do something that you’re wanting and willing to do, and to feel the energy in your body when you do that?
➤ Connecting with our Willingness Channel, Neo No and taking Willing action help us connect more with our Will, our true power.
☯ The more we are connected with our Love and Will, the more we are going to be able to support our children through these profound times whilst also feeling our own deep sense of compassion, interconnectedness, power and “I am not willing for….”
∞ I would say that it is a psychospiritual imperative to support the next generation feeling deeply interconnected, loving and truly powerful, to be able to express big clear Neo No’s and to co-create a new, post-domination culture.
❀ As my part in that, I have updated my Psychospiritual Parenting Course and am offering it again for the first time since 2019. There won’t be a live round until the second half of the year, but there are 30 hours of content to be imbibing until then!
❀ I’m also offering it on sale for the next 48 hours, to acknowledge how hard these times are for so many.
❀ I am also adding my Making Friends with Children’s Feelings Course to the sale, because I want to support more people to understand how to help your children express all the extra feelings which are so normal for them to be feeling right now.
❀ And I’m adding my Power and Powerlessness in Parenting Course to the sale too, because I also want to support parents in understanding how to understand how and why your powerlessness is showing up, how powerlessness becomes power-over, and how to feel more truly powerful in a loving and connected way.
❀ The coupon code for all three is NEWPARADIGM
There’s no space between the two words in the coupon code!
❀ It’s 44% off all three of these courses until the end of the 23rd of January.
♥ Big love xoxox