Although Aware Parenting is highly complex and nuanced in practice,
the philosophy is quite simple.
One core element of the theory is that all children feel painful feelings.
The more unmet needs, daily stress and larger trauma they have experienced, the more painful feelings they feel.
The more painful feelings that accumulate, the more uncomfortable and agitated they feel. Feelings are real physiological things.
The more feelings have accumulated, the more we will see some or more of the following things:
Antsy behaviour;
Wriggling and fidgeting;
Difficulty concentrating;
Bumping into things and falling over;
Avoiding eye contact;
Unwillingness to cooperate;
Agitation when going to sleep and taking a long to sleep even when tired;
Agitated during sleep and waking up frequently and early;
Mild forms of dissociation;
Roughness, taking, pushing, throwing.
However, they are all born with the capacity to express those feelings and release stress hormones from their bodies through laughter, play, crying and raging.
The more we understand and welcome the healing power of laughter, play, crying and raging, and the more capacity we have to support our children with these, the more they can express those feelings.
The more feelings they get to express, the more those feelings and stress hormones and tension leave their bodies, and the more we see the opposite of the behaviours in the list.