Hello!

Last night I went to see my daughter at her end of term dance concert.

I saw her just a few weeks ago, dancing in The Midsummer Night’s Dream.

And for a long time; many years in fact; I’ve had the sense that she was holding herself back from her competence; it has been as though she hasn’t been letting herself shine and be all that she can be.

But not last night. She came on stage for her solo en pointe, and as she danced I was entranced, amazed, and blown away.

She was absolutely shining. 

She was powerful.

She was letting her true self shine out and be seen.

For dance after dance, I saw her in her power.

I often cry when I watch her dance, but this time tears were streaming down my face.

It’s really the most important thing for me as a mother, to support my children in being deeply connected with who they really are, and able to express it – and here she was, absolutely expressing her soul.
 

It was when she was about 8, when I was immersed in my Field Training work, that I began to really realise that the ways that I was limiting myself were having an impact on her.

That was part of the impetus for me to finally do what I’d been longing to do, and start making online courses.

For me, we each have a higher Self; that’s kind of like the us that it beyond space and time and is connected with everything and everyone else.

And then there’s the soul, which is the unique self that we are, that comes into the world.

And third, is the personality – that is what gets formed around the soul, and is dependent on how we are responded to when we are growing up – and it’s why I’m passionate about Aware Parenting.
 

The more we are able to mirror our children accurately – which means being able to be with the whole range of their feelings, being able to acknowledge and celebrate the unique being that they are and the unique passion and life direction that they have, and the more we are able to support them in being with who they really are, then the more their personality is an accurate reflection of their soul.

And that is one of the most helpful gifts.

Because when our personality is in alignment with our soul, then we can keep following our soul, with our personality supporting that.

But for most of us who are adults now, there is generally quite a mismatch between our soul (who we really are) and who we think we are (our personality).

As we go through life, following our path, we have the opportunity to help our personality shift and change so that it is a more accurate representation of who we really are.

How does that happen?
 

Well, when we express feelings from the and have them heard, or hear them ourselves, then they get freed up and our soul can shine through more clearly.

As we release the judgmental thoughts that we internalised when we were growing up, and replace them with more compassionate, self-listening, and self-connected thoughts, then again our personality (ie. who we think we are) comes more close to who we really are.

That is why I love Aware Parenting and NVC. For me, they are ways that we can respond to our children that help their personality develop in alignment with their soul.
 

Back to me and my daughter.

As you’ve probably read about, I’ve been through some profound healing and releasing of fear related to coming out into the world and sharing my gifts and being competent, in the past few weeks.

And so it seems to me to be no accident that my daughter is now freer to shine and show who she is.

In the past I might have said that my shift came first, and then hers.

But nowadays, I couldn’t even say that. Who knows whether my shift helped her shift, or her shift helped my shift, or whether something else entirely helped us both shift.

But the possibility that me releasing old fear that was getting in the way of being who I am and sharing who I am in the world, helped her to let her soul shine through, inspires me even more to keep on this amazing journey!
 

I wonder if any of this resonates with you.

Do you notice how the themes you are working with are things that your child is working with too?

Do you notice that as you do a piece of healing, your child shifts in a similar way?