Hello!

Last week a book jumped out at me from my bookshelf.

It was by James Hillman, and I hadn’t read it for 20 years.

And I really enjoyed being reminded of the idea that each of us chooses our parents, to help us become who we are here to be.

And although there are quite a few things in the book I have a different perspective to (he thought that we place too much influence on the power of parents to shape someone’s lives – and of course my work is so much about our power as parents to shape a child’s life!)

Still, I enjoyed the reminder for myself about trusting myself as my children’s mother.

This came up for me a couple of years ago when I found myself comparing myself to another mother who I valued.

Eventually I came to realise that each of us are so unique, and that it was harmful for me to think in those ways of comparing myself.

The other day I was walking with my son up to the local lighthouse.

There was a Dad there with his kids, all with surfboards.

And I said to my son, “I guess if you were here to be a surfer, you would have chosen to have one or both parents who were surfers or who would take you surfing.”

I love that sense of trust that comes that there’s a reason we are our child’s parent.

My next door neighbour loves music. From an early age, her children had piano lessons. Now, many years on, there is beautiful music flowing out from their piano.

And again, in earlier years I used to compare my children to hers. I’ve offered both of my children music lessons, and my daughter taught herself the keyboard a few years ago and my son was into drumming for a while. But they weren’t really in to it. Again, I decided to stop comparing, and to trust them. And myself!

If I trust that if they needed to be exposed to lots of classical music to do what they are here to do, that they wouldn’t have chosen me and their Dad to be their parents.

As the years go by, I trust our own unique journey more and more. I see my children following their passions and interests, and I follow mine too – and that is deeply important to me.

And when I remember to trust the sense that they chose me to be their Mother, then I can relax and just keep on my own journey to be as me as I can be with them.

I wonder if any of this resonates with you.

Do you trust that your child/ren chose you?

If you did, what would it mean? How would you feel? What would change?

 

I’m redesigning my Marion Rose website and loving doing it!

I’ve been making the page for my free courses.

Perhaps you’re interested in my short free Self-compassion for Mothers Course?

You can sign up HERE or by clicking on the image below.

Love,

Marion

xxx